what's next?

So I think it's time for me to finally share my thoughts on the events in Egypt, the revolution and it's aftermath.
Here we go...

I was a skeptic and still am a skeptic. What I see now is not what I think is best for Egypt and I will attempt to present my thoughts in the most logic way possible, but I'm not here to offer negativity but I'd like to be positive in this discussion.

First, the Jan 25th revolution was something unthinkable and unexpected. I'd never thought to see in my lifetime for Mubarak to be overthrown. He has been president for almost my entire life (give or take 1-2 yrs). Tahrir square turned into a symbol of a peaceful revolution that was initiated by youth who basically had enough and wanted positive change. During the days of the revolution, everyone seemed to come out, whether in Tahrir or in the Neighborhood watches to keep the safety during the absence of the police. The youth that Egypt thought was useless, became the crux of the revolution and proved that they were not useless. They had a voice that was raised in Tahrir and protected its citizens when the police retreated. This was victory and perhaps 'yes we can' change Egypt. Then Feb 11th with the departure of Mubarak handing over the country to the military...everyone is singing, dancing in the street filled with joy. I sat in the office just stunned and couldn't believe what just happened. Wow, power to the youth, but wait--Egypt is under MARTIAL LAW AND CONTROL NOW. This isnt the freedom they wanted...do they know this? I didnt bother really commenting because everyone was way to joyful. Egyptians in the streets of Astoria had a celebration in the street...

During the days of the revolution, I kept asking...what's next? What is the plan of the youth to move the country forward? I got no answers in discussions I had. The Egyptian Revolution had no leader. It's not like other revolutions in history where there was a clear group of people in charge--Egypt's own revolution in the 1950s with a group of military officers that overthrew the foreign installed monarchy. It was clear who was in charge then, but there was no clarity in this time around. Alarms went off in my mind.

So let me fast forward until now. There's a lot that has happened between 11 Feb and today 20 May....I won't even touch the issue Muslim/Christian relations/issues because that deserves its own post (still organizing my own thoughts). The Egyptian Army today is in charge...chants went from 'el sha3b wal geesh eid wahda' (people and army one hand) to chants against the army. Why? The solution today in Egypt if you dont like something, you protest. You go to Tahrir every Friday for a different theme, or Copts sit in front of the Egyptian State TV building in Maspero to chant for their rights. Three decades of Mubarak's rule put a lid on freedom of expression, so I can understand when people finally feel free to speak their minds and stand up for their beliefs...i have no problem with that, that's what brought down the regime in the first place and has attracted the attention of the interim government.

My question to the youth, what's next beyond the protests? There are ELECTIONS set for September. I think it's time for the youth who are constantly bashing any government whether it be their own or the US, Israel, Saudi or any other government they blame for their current woes, to act. It's great to protest, but go ask the average Egyptian who dont attend protests. You will hear about their economic, job, security issues. The revolution brought change, but I've spoken to so many people where they're concerned about how their business tanked. Go beyond Tahrir to the different governates, create your own party to show what your plan is for Egypt. Do public outreach, and most importantly listen. I've seen all over the social networks the lack of wanting to listen to others. Comments about Obama's Middle East Speech before he even gave it showed evidence of not wanting to listen. Obama's speech was to show the US understanding of the Middle East/North Africa; pre-election speech and an attempt to outreach the Arab world (which was rejected). The first step in any type of conflict resolution is to listen to the other side....perhaps they do have something to help and contribute to making Egypt a better country. Show the world that you can succeed in revolutions and also help move the country forward in all arenas. Yah I know...I don't live in Egypt. Egyptians abroad do support you and your cause, but honestly it's time to effectively organize and prepare for the next step. It would be unfair for a new government to be elected that is worse than the previous one....it's time to educate the uneducated, and most importantly listen to your fellow countrymen who appreciate your efforts to free them from a dictator. Continue to battle the injustices, but also look to the future...a future without effective planning and organizing can negate the efforts of freedom....

it's just the beginning

again there are so many topics i could write on. things have been just really crazy in our world, especially in egypt. however im leaving current events just for a moment focus on the joys of life. the joys of having a hobby and as you can read from before ive been taking a photography class that ended last night in an exhibit. i know there can be a lot of 'oh who cares, there are plenty of photographers out there' but this has been a journey where it's only just the beginning.

St. Thomas last August: My little point and shoot that I absolutely loved got fried on the last day. My heart was broken because I love to take pictures and to document random things as well. As soon as I landed in NYC I was on the hunt for another point and shoot until a friend of mine told me i should buy a DSLR camera. I've been always 'scared' to get one because i always thought those were for professionals. I did some research on buying a DSLR camera. While I was chaperoning the junior high school convention for church, I decided to take the plunge and showed Father Armia the camera that I was about to buy. I think he thought I was crazy to buy an expensive thing but something told me to do so.

In between unpacking, laundry and repacking from the junior high retreat and going to Spain I made my way to J&R in downtown Manhattan and bought the camera...24 hours later I was off to Spain and took 3000 pics on automatic mode in one week....I enjoyed my new toy and my parents were also impressed with the camera but taken aback by the price.

So I decided to take a class and found Photo Manhattan...a tiny school dedicated to teach people like me how to take proper photos. On a personal level, I wanted to do something for me, because I'm always running around doing something for someone else. Something that didn't really involve 'church' related activities or something where it's not centered around going out to eat. NYC is a fabulous city and we really dont take advantage of what it has to offer. More importantly, because we live in a large city, we tend to forget our basic needs and end up running around like a chicken with it's head cut off. So often we dont develop our God given talents because we are 'too busy' and can't stop for 5 seconds just to calm down.

The class I took was amazing and my instructor was fabulous...words cannot describe the value I got from the class for photo technique and most importantly FOR ME. My final project was on the church....more specifically the church where I grew up and serve at. I had support from the priests, friends, family and congregants to take photos. I shot my photos in between Palm Sunday and Easter where a lot happens in the Coptic church. Our Coptic Orthodox Church is a church that uses the five senses to praise God--I love that about our church...we are a very visual church (yah things may take longer but whatever). Many people don't know too much about our church so my final project was giving that inside view. After taking pictures...many people commented on how beautiful our church is and how they felt like they were present with us during Holy Week. It's taking that time to get the shot from that different angle. I've been at St. George's for my entire life (which is almost 32 years) and just when I think I've seen it all, I know I havent. I believe that's what our Christianity is about...to experience God in a new way on a daily basis. While the hymns stay the same, there's a new meaning or message we can benefit from...
It's the same thru photography, there's a new angle or viewpoint for us to experience despite the 'same old' space.

So last night the exhibit...
My parents came out to support me---they've been my biggest fans and support (now im getting a little teary eyed)
My priest and his wife--they came and took the time to look at each photo at the exhibit. i was personally touched and appreciated that they came out despite their busy lives...again i'm speechless (still teary eyed)
My friends--this group has heard me hours on end talk about photography and my class and take pics here and there...and 'can you be my subject?' LOL the support I got from my friends was just amazing.
My teacher-- you always want to impress the 'professional' but there was a more personal approach to her teaching...she taught photography as if you knew nothing (that was me). the feedback she gave helped so much. critiquing was a lot of fun because she was not out to criticize the subject for the final project but rather make sure that i take the best possible technical photos for the final project. our class bonded towards the end. even as we put up the pictures, she made sure that we shined by putting photos in the correct order. i saw other students not getting that personal attention...it's a testament how her teaching shines thru our work.

You learn people's personalities thru photography. You learn about someone's story. For me getting the right shot was almost a boost in my own self esteem and this 'can do' spirit. Photography is a very competitive field professionally and as people know I'm not a competitive person...actually I run away from it. But tapping into this talent/hobby...I've learned I can own it in my personal way. How I view the world is different. For now, I'm going to keep shooting because I know I have some message to send. For my final project, it was about the church---I got some snapshots of our priests praying, little deacon kids lined up and the things we use for prayer. The pictures came out so amazing and I know that the Author of Life was definitely snapping with me as I took the photos.

Solemn Hope

Since hearing the news about the killing of Osama bin Laden, I had this urge to go down to visit ground zero. Sunday and Monday evenings had mass gatherings of those reflecting on the last 10 years as well coming together once again for unity purposes. I really wanted to go down, so I went last night. There were no mass gatherings and honestly I believe I benefitted from the silence. Down at ground zero are posters of fallen ones, flowers, balloons, American flags, newspaper clippings and the most moving--THANK YOUs...to the US military, Intel, first responders, presidents. No one was trying to politicize it...but an outpouring of love and appreciation. The last time I saw posters of those who perished on 9/11 was back in November 2001. It was my first visit back to NYC since the horrible tragedy...I took the train home and Penn Station and Grand Central Station turned into a makeshift headquarters of billboards of people looking for those lost loved ones. I remember I almost could not continue to walk that day. Last night was completely different.

I met two interesting people--first a lady who brought her daughter who stood there, prayed and said 'sometimes if you have the urge to do something, you have to do it, i had to come here tonight'. I shared the same sentiments. She was moved by the outpouring of love along the fence at the construction site. Second was a tourist from Kansas...I found out later that he's originally from Tanzania. He was overwhelmed by the site and the destruction that occurred but was more impressed by the NY spirit to rebuild.

Finally I had time for my own reflection. I stood in the street in front of the entrance of where the two towers once stood. It brought me back to the summer of 1999. I spent the entire summer taking classes on the 50 something floor of Tower 1 in the World Trade Center. I envision the Krispy Kreme donuts and the Borders book store...I remember having breakfast every morning before class--seeing all of NYC and being on top of the brooklyn bridge. The views of NYC from inside the WTC were simply breathtaking. I took a class on NYC history that summer as well as an internship. I learned in that class that where the WTC stood, was not originally part of Manhattan island but was landfill to extend the island. I can remember that view as if it was yesterday. On my way back to my vehicle, I passed by St. Paul's church--one of the oldest churches in the city and the site where many first responders sought refuge to take a nap or eat during the aftermath of 9/11. Then I saw the cross beams that now is on the side of St. Peter's Catholic church. Those cross beams stood as a sign of hope for the first responders.

I left happy that I went on a night where it was pretty much calm. There were a lot of news trucks and beefed up security in preparation for President Obama's visit to be held tomorrow. I benefited from that calm knowing that while there was so much death and destruction and loss on 9/11...but 10 years later there is a sense of rebuilding, moving ahead with a hope of a stronger sense of American spirit and knowing that God is looking over our great American city.

God Bless America

Yesterday I was on my way home from Canada and traveled through Buffalo International Airport to get home. For the first time, I cooperated and used the new x-ray machine that has sparked so much controversy, my mom refused to go through and the TSA agents were understanding. We grumble going through airport security and question why we must do so. On my way to Canada I saw an old lady in a wheelchair getting stripped down and somehow it seemed unfair. However we comply and move on.

On my way home, I got a phone call from my dad saying to turn on 1010wins (the AM radio news/weather station). I thought the bridge going home was shut down so I asked why, so my dad said 'Osama Bin Laden was captured'...so I hung up with dad and immediately turned on CNN on my satellite radio...I didn't need the dunkin donuts coffee to keep me awake for the rest of the way. I learned that Osama Bin Laden was dead, not captured. I crossed over the Whitestone Bridge and to my left a very clear NYC skyline that put a huge smile on my face. Tears came to my eyes, because it was 1- 10 yrs after 9/11 he got killed 2- We learn about his death on the Feast of St. George. 3-somehow justice is served.

I'm not one to rejoice over someone getting killed...and I dont think that this does much to bring back the 3000 + people who died on 9/11, but it gives us a new focus. Almost 10 years after that fateful day, we have had constant debates if Gitmo should be closed, role of US troops and intelligence, questionable involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan, etc; however last night we were united in that American spirit. I witnessed the joy in Washington, DC the night Obama was elected into presidency, I witnessed all of us when we displayed our patriotism on the days after 9/11...but regardless of political affiliation, last night was for America and a symbolic victory that our country has spent countless hours and taxpayer dollars trying to find.

I thank our United States Military and Intelligence Personnel who have put their lives on the line for our freedom and safety. It is so easy for us to debate their role without a full understanding the danger behind protecting our country. Watching the 9/11 families this morning comment on their feelings...was just something so moving....We will never forget those who perished and we will never forget the efforts to keep our country safe. As we rebuild NYC, the destroyer was killed....we remain vigilant, strong and hopeful for our future.

God bless America +

de-facebook experiment

photography is going well....the exhibition is in 2 weeks and I took over 800 photos for Holy week, you can see some on facebook. now to what i want to talk about...my deactivation from facebook for lent. I decided to do this for many reasons but one main reason was that i was just wasting a lot of time. i felt that this social network became the way i knew about everyone's business without really asking about them to their face. So as I saw uploads and status messages, I felt the more traditional means of communication was becoming obsolete, but i was also finding that close friendships started to strain as a result of not having a normal phone conversation...so I deactivated.

In the first 2-3 days of my deactivation, part of me wanted to reactivate, but I stuck to my guns. I spent 55 days not knowing if someone was sick, if they were in the bathroom, what they were eating and I found myself that my time that I spent on facebook went to other things (okay so I do have a twitter account), but I was a little more productive with my time and I had more meaningful one on one conversations with people. I did however miss out on invitations to places since I just wasnt on facebook for people to click on me and invite me to a party....but I was okay with out understanding that it's just easier to invite on facebook rather than sending out a mass text or heaven forbid a phone call.

Easter Sunday rolled around and I reactivated and I found myself to be overwhelmed by information overload. Once again I know about the 600 or so 'friends' I have on facebook. Here are my findings from this social deactivation experiment.

1- Facebook is an excellent tool to find people you've lost touch over the years (that includes the people I grew up with in Pleasantville and college friends)
2- I can't possibly remember everyone's birthdays--facebook is great for that...
3- Facebook has made us socially lazy to have one on one communications....in my opinion, nothing is better than having a good old conversation :)
4- Photos---many people missed my photo postings and it was literally one of things I did after i reactivated.
5- I need to be more active in reaching out to people individually and privately without the social tool.

There's a lot more I'm going to stop for now....watch out for more posts regarding my photography expeditions....

some days arent the best

The other day I had the most awesome opportunity to use friends during for a photo shoot. It was my first photo shoot using my camera in manual mode. I was really excited and so were there. As I kept snapping I noticed I had major lighting issues, my subjects (friends) were either too light or too dark. I was getting frustrated. I started questioning my talent for photography and felt a little down. I can't give up though. I was really humbled knowing that there's just a lot to learn and also that my friends are supporting my hobby. Many people have been telling me that I should start a side business but I feel at this point in time it would take the fun out of what I love to do. There's something about capturing a moment at the right time (with of course the right exposure)....At the end of the day I realized that all photographers go through this....there are some bad/off days, but I did manage to come out with some nice shots.

I have a new respect for photographers who do shoots for a living...there is so much effort and pressure to make sure that the image is perfect.

photo love

so much has happened this year and i haven't kept up on this blog to document the egyptian revolution and the aftermath that basically brought out all sorts of skeletons in the closet. one of which including that the egyptian interior ministry was behind the bombing in alexandria....there was an earthquake in japan followed by a tsunami...one of the worst disasters recorded....

however behind the current events, i started to do something that i love....photography. i started taking classes. i was so scared my first day not knowing if i would make friends or even if i would be good at it. it turns out, i have made new friends, and i find some sort of refuge by taking photos. this past weekend i had an amazing backdrop to actually snap in manual mode....and i impressed myself, although others haven't stopped with the critiques. all those photo lovers with point and shoot...you're missing out on manual mode...the reason being...you have extra creative control....

so hopefully ill post more about my experience, it's truly amazing for me :)